ifpaintingscouldtext: Delphin Enjolras | The Murmur of the Sea | c.1875
Road Trip Cell Phone Pics
So we were stoned and out of no where realised it’s almost April and fuck taxes are due! In a baked semi-panic we decided to get it over with and just do it, even though it had been a long day. We agreed to follow last years precedent and promised some making out followed by some filthy rough sex as soon as the daunting task of filing our taxes was complete.
We set up at the dining room table, took turns choosing tunes and made light of our least favourite annual task. He wore a pair of costume glasses without lenses because he wanted to get into character. He called me by a secretary-ish name and we took breaks for snacks and goofiness.
We finished! High-fived and then realised that we were space cadets and the deadline for filing is the end of April, not the 1st.
Double high five! For once in our lives we did our taxes early. Thank you weed.
How do we even qualify as grown ups?
(Also? He looks good in the glasses… time to make good on the smooch-fest with fucktacular results.)
2:47pm- Me: Careful, you don’t want to wear out my little mouth before the party… Him: Aw but you like it when you’re sore, makes you feel like such a good little slut doesn’t it? Me: *blushes*
4:19pm- “Let’s smoke a joint and have an early dinner, I don’t want to feel bloated if we’re going to be group-naked later.” Genius plan.
6:51pm- ”This is the smoothest it’s ever been. That’s how we do it from now on, you have a long bath before I shave your puss.” -My husband (Hee hee… This ritual keeps getting better.)
7:50pm- Somehow knowing I’ll be naked for most of the party means I spend twice as long on my hair and make up. Femme-security-blanket ftw.
8:17pm- omg OMG you know what would go perfectly with my costume?! My pretty pink cuffs!!!! SQUEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
8:39pm- (Dies from awesome when she realises her pink earrings match her cuffs which match her panties.)
9:58pm- My sexy husband and I snicker as we pass a giant billboard en route to the party with the following ad:
Fuck those Winter blahhhhhhs. I went to my favourite bakery today and bought some sort of salted caramel chocolate brownie and cookie dough cake. Yes sir I did. And I am going to smoke a joint and eat the whole cake and cross my fingers that my husband follows through with that foot-rub he promised. (And then see about following up on some of the things I may have promised.)
Bad habits are
bad habit-y awesome. (Current status.)