Whoop! It’s finally Friday tumbl buddies!!!
Today my to-do list is a mile long so I’ll be posting pretty girls and counting down the minutes until I’m nestled in the woods sitting around the campfire. 
Also; the moral of the story above is don’t give Heart vodka in public places unless you are prepared for a distinct loosening of moral conduct. 

Whoop! It’s finally Friday tumbl buddies!!!

Today my to-do list is a mile long so I’ll be posting pretty girls and counting down the minutes until I’m nestled in the woods sitting around the campfire. 

Also; the moral of the story above is don’t give Heart vodka in public places unless you are prepared for a distinct loosening of moral conduct. 

Tags | me | saucy | pale skin | flash | peek | bra | tipsy | drunk | vodka | public |
Dear Tumbl Buddies,
You’ve been so wonderful this week, and we’ve made it! It’s finally Fridayyyyy! (And a long weekend for us Canadian folks! Whoot!)
So to celebrate here is an incredibly saucy picture I took a few weeks ago in a change room. 
Love hard and play hard this weekend, we deserve it I think.
-Heart <3

Dear Tumbl Buddies,

You’ve been so wonderful this week, and we’ve made it! It’s finally Fridayyyyy! (And a long weekend for us Canadian folks! Whoot!)

So to celebrate here is an incredibly saucy picture I took a few weeks ago in a change room. 

Love hard and play hard this weekend, we deserve it I think.

-Heart <3

@ the bookstore with Heart

Oh the weather outside is frightful… let’s hide out in the bookstore and think spring-ish thoughts. 

GPOY

Smurfette is saucy. Text Daddy to inform him.

So many triggers for feminist rage. (OVER 1 MILLION COPIES SOLD ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?!?!? )

Breathe…

Find cutest sticky notes of all time. Pout that the patriarchy can pacify me with cute bunnies. Justify purchasing bunny sticky-notes because I’ll use them for good instead of evil. 

Find the book I was looking for as well as a few gifts for someone special. Day dream while I pay for my purchases. 

Take spontaneous photo of my glow in the dark (oh yes) Batman panties in the washroom before bundling up and heading home in the big fluffy snowflakes. 

(Source: herdirtylittleheart)

I wanted love But not for myself But for the girl So she could love herself
-The Black Keys

I wanted love 
But not for myself 
But for the girl 
So she could love herself

-The Black Keys

(Source: herdirtylittleheart)

Sure saucy girls finish last, but they have the most fun.

nettierharris: Photog-Bartosz Ludwinski, Model-Nettie Harris, Location- Hamburg Germany

Sure saucy girls finish last, but they have the most fun.

nettierharris: Photog-Bartosz Ludwinski, Model-Nettie Harris, Location- Hamburg Germany

Me: Do you know what sound zebra&#8217;s make?
Daddy: I don&#8217;t know baby, tell me.
Me:*zzzzzzzzzzzzzip*

Me: Do you know what sound zebra’s make?

Daddy: I don’t know baby, tell me.

Me:*zzzzzzzzzzzzzip*

I lied. That is not all. It turns out baby zebra&#8217;s are very saucy&#8230;

I lied. That is not all. It turns out baby zebra’s are very saucy…

I&#8217;m feeling saucy today.
Let the posting of pretty girls (and flirting with pretty girls) begin.

I’m feeling saucy today.

Let the posting of pretty girls (and flirting with pretty girls) begin.

(Source: goofylace)

Shake it Out - Phase 6&#160;
The party kept gaining momentum. Shots were had. Bums were made pink. Tipsy Heart was shaking her ass and flirting.
Euro Girl approached me with a dilemma. She and NYC Boy needed to make a quick escape to avoid an awkward situation with a former partner who had showed up. I tried to brain storm, I could tell she was in a bit of a tizzy, but the vodka was talking to me and I just wanted my hands all tangled in her hair like they used to be.
"What do we do?!" she asked.
"Ummmm&#8230;. I don&#8217;t know," I feigned sincerity. "Maybe if you make out with me we&#8217;ll come up with something?"
I&#8217;d caught her off guard, she paused, glanced at me sideways for a second before her face split into a wide grin. &#8220;Worth a shot,&#8221; she said and grabbed me, and pulled me close.
It was a long kiss, the urgent kind where our lips and teeth gnashed just a little and she pressed herself against me. My hands in her wavy mess of hair, she smelled like Moroccan Oil. God, did I ever need a kiss like that.
She pulled away and looked up quizzically, &#8220;Nope, it didn&#8217;t help&#8230;. where&#8217;s your husband, maybe kissing him would help too.&#8221; We laughed.
While she was kissing him her partner and I hatched a plan. Since I knew the owner of the club I offered to help them leave out the emergency exit and get them into a cab.
She was saying goodbye to my husband as I was leaning into the taxi to say goodbye to hers. &#8220;You owe me,&#8221; I winked. &#8220;Hey, I do owe you, and my wife is in love with you,&#8221; he said, I could tell he was a little loose-lipped from the shots. &#8220;I get it, our chemistry is lacking, and when you acknowledged that it made me respect you even more. I think you guys are awesome. And she is crazy about you, why don&#8217;t you girls just go out on a date sometime? Go to the spa, go for dinner, whatever you like. Take her out, spend some time with her, she&#8217;d really love it, and I&#8217;m supportive of it.&#8221; He was holding my hand in his. He was wide eyed and sincere. &#8220;I would love that too,&#8221; I replied, she grabbed my bum and smooched me on the cheek on her way into the cab. I was left standing there with a goofy grin as they pulled away.

Shake it Out - Phase 6 

The party kept gaining momentum. Shots were had. Bums were made pink. Tipsy Heart was shaking her ass and flirting.

Euro Girl approached me with a dilemma. She and NYC Boy needed to make a quick escape to avoid an awkward situation with a former partner who had showed up. I tried to brain storm, I could tell she was in a bit of a tizzy, but the vodka was talking to me and I just wanted my hands all tangled in her hair like they used to be.

"What do we do?!" she asked.

"Ummmm…. I don’t know," I feigned sincerity. "Maybe if you make out with me we’ll come up with something?"

I’d caught her off guard, she paused, glanced at me sideways for a second before her face split into a wide grin. “Worth a shot,” she said and grabbed me, and pulled me close.

It was a long kiss, the urgent kind where our lips and teeth gnashed just a little and she pressed herself against me. My hands in her wavy mess of hair, she smelled like Moroccan Oil. God, did I ever need a kiss like that.

She pulled away and looked up quizzically, “Nope, it didn’t help…. where’s your husband, maybe kissing him would help too.” We laughed.

While she was kissing him her partner and I hatched a plan. Since I knew the owner of the club I offered to help them leave out the emergency exit and get them into a cab.

She was saying goodbye to my husband as I was leaning into the taxi to say goodbye to hers. “You owe me,” I winked. “Hey, I do owe you, and my wife is in love with you,” he said, I could tell he was a little loose-lipped from the shots. “I get it, our chemistry is lacking, and when you acknowledged that it made me respect you even more. I think you guys are awesome. And she is crazy about you, why don’t you girls just go out on a date sometime? Go to the spa, go for dinner, whatever you like. Take her out, spend some time with her, she’d really love it, and I’m supportive of it.” He was holding my hand in his. He was wide eyed and sincere. “I would love that too,” I replied, she grabbed my bum and smooched me on the cheek on her way into the cab. I was left standing there with a goofy grin as they pulled away.

(Source: )

Can we have a moment of silence…. for the saucy-as-fuck faces that I have to crop out of the pictures I post of myself here on my blog? I know all you other sexy tumblr girls know what I mean, and all of you secret self-shooters too. You feel sad inside editing out the best elements of the image. I mean, not to brag, but I can give a pretty serious eye fuck, and I’m also kinda goofy, and between those details and the dimple I’m seriously cropping out some of the most entertaining parts.

The few people who see them appreciate them enough for everyone though, I assure you.

Also; baked Saturday mornings with blueberry pancakes. Self-care for the win.

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