When I say “boys are dumb” what I really mean is “boys have been raised in a patriarchal society that forces them into an incorrect and problematic view of masculinity that not only forces them to strip away valuable virtues from themselves, like patience and gentleness, but also forces them them to view and treat women in unhealthy ways that devalues women as people and makes them into objects purely for a man’s benefit”
1. The bunny is not allowed in the house. 2. OK, the bunny is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms. 3. The bunny is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture. 4. The bunny can get on the old furniture only. 5. Fine, the bunny is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with humans, on the bed. 6. OK, the bunny is allowed on the bed, but only by invitation. 7. The bunny can sleep on the bed when-ever he wants, but not under the covers. 8. The bunny can sleep under the covers by invitation only. 9. The bunny can sleep under the covers every night. 10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the bunny.
Heh heh… totally the same set of rules Daddy has for me.
It began as many of my sexual curiosities do,I saw a gif. I was mesmerized, what was this flexible white softness and how could I play with one immediately?
Then I was impulse book-buying on Amazon and noticed they sold the toys I had been curious about, they were called Tenga Eggs. A few days later a beautiful box arrived at my house containing books and sex toys (BEST!) including the Tenga Egg Variety Pack.
The eggs were so much fun right from the start, the design is pretty and non-threatening, the packaging is playful and I promised my husband I wouldn’t tie his cock up. (If you didn’t click the gif link in the first paragraph you might wanna or that won’t make any sense.)
The eggs made of a super flexible elastomer, it’s soft on the outside and inside there are different textures.
Using some water-based lube (included) the soft stretchy eggs become a very fun sensory toy.
The Tenga Egg is definitely ‘One Size Fits All’, as advertised. (In fact I found this image of some dude with one stretched over his entire head.) And it feels amazing. Circumcised and un-circumcised penises will succumb to it’s glorious sensations! (And I must admit it really turns me on to see the head of a cock throbbing through it, I really enjoyed watching.)
Even better is that this toy is good for all kinds of genitals! NOT JUST PENISES!!!!!
I loved flipping the tenga inside-out so that it was over my fingers, and rubbing the textured softness over my clit. It made me cum in record time with minimal effort.
In fact my husband and I were adventurous and figured out a few different ways to use them for individual and mutual enjoyment. We’re creative folk, what can I say?
But the best idea? I flipped the egg inside out over top of my hitachi magic wand, so it became a topper for the vibrating head. And Ho. Lee. Fuck.
(This is me sitting on it and humping it a little. Blush-town.)
The bottom line is the Tenga Eggs were totally worth the $40 the pack cost me, you can use them several times over if you wash and dry them properly and we have had a ton of fun with them. If you’re looking for a nifty new solo toy, or If you are fortunate enough to have a playful partner, I highly recommend them.
ED: This was an unsolicited and unpaid review, I have no affiliation with Tenga, I just really liked the toy and thought you would too. xo
New Crush Courtesy of the Feminist Porn Conference 2014: Episode 1 Madison Young
One of the greatest side effects of attending the Feminist Porn Conference a few weeks ago was having the chance to get to know new performers and directors I hadn’t been exposed to before.
I’m one of those people who crushes a lot harder on folks when I have had the chance to talk to them, hear about their interests and get to know them a bit. I am also a sapiosexual, and hearing these intelligent entertainers speak about topics they are passionate about ignited my flame in a way that simply perusing porn vids never could.
Without further ado, may I introduce Madison Young.
Madison describes herself as a “sex-positive Tasmanian devil” and a sexual revolutionary.
She is a porn performer, feminist, artist, film director, sex-educator, gallery director, sex-coach, Mother, and has recently penned a memoir called Daddy.
When she was on the panel at a session called "Rope Sluts, and Bottoms, and Subs Oh My!" I found myself hanging onto her every word. The way she spoke of her identity as a submissive really resonated with me.
Some of my favourite Madison Young quotes from that particular session:
"I’m very aggressive in my submission. I swallow and engulf dominant energy and pain like I would a part of their body."
"BDSM does not depend on the gender or genitals of the people involved. It’s an exchange of energy as equals. It’s gifting loving energy and sensation from one person to another. Many people think bdsm can’t coexist with feminism, but bdsm allows so much space for it."
"My submission, my feminism, my queerness does not depend on someone else. It is part of my identity. I wanted to document how I like to have sex. I am a feminist, & I am kinky, so my porn was going to be feminist kink porn. I can’t be inauthentic."
When I got home I read more about Madison, including her artistic statement for her gallery show Becoming MILF, an artistic commentary on Motherhood and sexuality. I continued to be struck by her unique voice and fearless message.
I knew I was smitten when after the session we were chatting and I asked her about her upcoming projects… she described a Davie Bowie themed Ziggy Stardust porn in which SHE PLAYS DAVID BOWIE!!!! DAVID BOWIE THEMED PORN!!!!!
Okay so after getting a dozen messages from folks saying they would also like a “Congratulations, slut.” mug I am hoping the magic of tumblr can help me make this happen. (Click here for context.)
If you are artsy or design-y and can create an awesome (perhaps sparkly pink?) “Congratulations, slut.” logo that I can then have printed on a giant mug I would be eternally grateful. You can submit it here if you feel like being a hero and helping me on my quest for an incredibly sassy mug.
We went to a sex club, one with a busy dance-floor and a dark array of play areas. I know the owners, so we enjoyed preferential treatment and free cocktails and while I was giving her the grand tour I made sure to pinch her a little when we walked past the cage in the bdsm room.
We both wore cute cocktail dresses and I introduced her to a few friends. A handsome man interjected and told us he was from Paris, I shot back a response in fluent French and smirked when his Montreal accent and his French-Canadian slang gave him away.
We found a quiet corner and curled up on a couch to talk some more and people watch, eventually we found the courage to wriggle out of our little dresses and head towards the play area. She wore a cute little see through-mesh body suit underneath and I was in a push up bra, polkadot panties and boots.
I held her hand tight as we pushed through the crowd of half-naked men surrounding the open play areas, couples fucking and loud moaning filled the room. She squeezed me and I pulled her through to the quieter bdsm area. There were couples all around and a few groups of people sitting and watching, a busy bar was in the corner, everybody turned to watch us when we came in the room. As progressive as this space is femme-femme couples are rare.
I teased her about putting her in the cage, but in all honestly I’d have felt awkward just twirling my hair and trying to look cute while she was in there. It was a really busy night and there were a lot of single dudes and in an effort to create some physical proximity my eyes were drawn to the spanking bench in the corner. I had a plan, I’m pretty sure she could tell from the flicker in my eyes. “What’s a spanking bench?” she asked in that innocent little voice that pushes all of the Daddy-buttons.
I walked her over and patted the lower part of the bench, helping her up so she could kneel on it. I moved some of the chairs and tables around us to create a bit of a barrier between us and the crowd, and as she leaned forward to brace herself I couldn’t help but smile. In this position her cute little white bum was perfection, her back was arched and the lacy mesh bodysuit give her a tiny hint of modesty, her face buried in her hands was well hidden by her wavy blonde hair.
My back was to the room but I could feel eyes on me as I started to spank her, the sound of flesh on flesh ringing out in the most satisfying way. She squirmed and her little feet showed she was nervous, I leaned forward and brushed her hair from her face “You okay? Does this feel good?” I asked. She squeaked a reply. “If you keep blushing like that I’m gonna make you turn around and look at all of the people who are watching.” She squirmed harder.
I continued to spank her, letting the pinkness of her cheeks guide me in spreading out the impact and making sure we could keep this up for a while. I could feel a man approaching, I didn’t make eye contact in hopes that he would take the hint and leave us alone. He didn’t. He made a few comments, trying to be included where he obviously wasn’t welcome. “Yeah, spank her harder, that’s right, keep spanking her,” I took a deep breath. As a woman who has enjoyed group sex and kink for years I can assure you nothing rubs me the wrong way like a man trying to play director when I clearly know what I’m doing. I didn’t want to tell him off and ruin the playful energy we had going, but… “Oh yeah, spank her again,” he said, and I stopped what I was doing, stood up tall and turn to look him dead in the eyes. “I don’t need any direction thanks,” I said, kindly but firmly. He mumbled a quick apology and stammered that he’d never seen anything so hot, he took a few steps back and shut his fucking mouth. Success.
Her bum was bright pink and warm to the touch now, I told her to be a good girl and take a peek behind her at the crowd, there were significantly more people in the room now watching us, some of them fucking, some of them just smiling and taking it in. I asked if she wanted more and she said yes, so I told her she could hide her face again since she was being so good. I took pity on her red ass though and looked back at the bar with my brow furrowed trying to use the force to summon a cup of ice, when I caught the eye of the unsolicited director dude. I smiled “Hey, could you do me a favour?” I asked him, “Of course, anything!” he replied. I snickered watching this burly man trot off to do my bidding, dominant head-space is kind of a trip, huh?
When he returned he handed me the ice and quickly told me how kind I was to her, how nice it was to watch. “Of course!” I said, pulling her hair back, “She’s my little girl!” He stepped back to give us space and I rubbed ice all over the red welts from my hands. She gasped and arched her back and squirmed as the ice dripped down between her legs. The next few smacks were extra sting-y because my hands were wet. “Such a good girrrrrl” I cooed at her.
I looked behind me at the stack of fresh towels that were just out of reach and motioned for the bystander to hand me one. “Look how helpful you are!” I chided him before ignoring him completely.
I dried her off and she started to moan as my palms struck her harder than before. The sound of her sharp breath encouraged me. This was too much fun.
When we were finished I told her how proud I was of her and we pushed past our audience to the main bar-area for a much earned drink.
It was the first time I’d ever dominated anyone in front of a crowd.
“When she comes:
she pulls you close
she breathes in short bursts
her eyes close
her head tilts back
her mouth opens slightly
her thighs turn to steel, and then melt
she is perfect
and you feel like you are everything.”—Mr. Henry Rollins (via namelessin314)